Velvet-Covered Diamonds

Black women tend to be thought of as angry, hard, feisty, no-nonsense, loud, independent (to a fault), etc.  But they are also thought known to be lovers, mothers, supporters of communities and families, soft, warm, plate fixers, boo-boo-kissers, voluptuous, colorful and phenomenal.   Something that came to me as I was thinking about this topic was why do we treat people at work sometimes better than we treat our own spouse or significant other at home?